Prompted by numerous personal questions and allusions, Biba sets the record straight. She lovingly urges us to be aware and beware of the fires of judgement and gossip, of negativity and jealousy that perpetually mislead us. Instead she invites us to join her in soaring above, in taking a higher view of the purpose of marriage, of life and liberation, and to enjoy the unlimited views from Mohanji’s platform of unconditional love and service.
More than any of the wedding photos, it is this photo that I love and treasure the most. It was taken soon after Mohanji and I met in Dubai in 2007. It was only two years later that I noticed the most auspicious imprint of Light on our foreheads – AUM symbol on his and a cross on mine. What a beautiful gift from the Divine, a blessing signifying union based on Love that transcends the boundaries of religions. And this is exactly what we were brought together to serve, what lies in the heart of our spiritual mission – purity and unconditionality of love beyond all barriers, leading to liberation.
It does not take long to realize that Mohanji truly is beyond barriers, open and universal. He cannot be bound. If anyone tries to bind him, he or she will lose him forever. He is like the wind. You can never bind wind. Once he said “We are terrestrially married. But, many people are married to my consciousness. All are inseparably connected. All are one!” It is wonderful to belong to our fast-growing global family – I am its member and that gives me tremendous fulfillment. I am its least jealous member as I know that many people may be even more connected than I to Mohanji’s consciousness. It does not matter. We are all one consciousness. Nobody can own consciousness – we can only choose to ‘plug in’ or not to do so.
Just for the record’s sake, when someone implied recently that I was supporting Mohanji financially because at present I am still working in Oman, I told them the truth. Mohanji sticks to his dharma (duty) to the whole world, including his immediate family and the larger family across the globe. Ever since Mohanji left his job in June 2012, and even before, he has not taken a single penny from me. Instead, he has always contributed in many ways, financially or otherwise, directly or through other people. He has always earned his own living. When I was low in funds and had a genuine requirement, he would take care in the minutest ways. For example, my phone got damaged recently, and without me telling him, a new and better phone arrived. He ensures our lives flow smoothly and that any real requirements are taken care of in the present. We may not have great savings and financial insurance/assurance for the future, but we have something far more valuable – a global spiritual family and true surrender to the Divine. After Mohanji left the corporate world I was not sure how he would handle finances, but now I see that Mohanji is not dependent on my or anyone else’s income – he only gives and never takes from anyone. People do give him gifts or money out of gratitude; but he never asks anyone. Even if he takes something from someone, he gives them much more than what he takes. There are numerous testimonials to support this.
Marrying Mohanji was a conscious choice that I made. He even warned me that he would not be the regular husband material expected by regular women. He said “I operate based on fulfillment. Fulfillment is essential to walk the path of liberation. Unfulfilled desires lead to binding and further births. I do whatever it takes to unhook from time, place, people and events continuously and consistently. I never allow myself to be bound nor do I bind those who come to me. I must stay liberated to lead others to liberation. In my life, there are no do’s or don’ts – whether society understands this or not, there is only liberation. Just a single pointed journey towards complete liberation. Even if there is one desire, it may bring you back to earth.”
Mohanji interacts with many people on daily basis – most genuinely care, but there are also some who express jealousy and ingratitude. After gaining so much from him, they turn around and criticize him. I often feel a lot of sadness when I see such people leaving with bitterness and enmity. Mohanji always remains unaffected. He has total clarity towards his mission. He keeps walking. Many people tried to topple him or slow him down. He kept moving and took care of the people who chose to walk with him on this mighty path of liberation. He never hated anyone for scandalizing him; instead he loved them and prevented angry retaliations from his people. Some would bring a bag full of expectations and when Mohanji could not fulfill all of them, they would walk away from him to another guru. He was never bothered. He never cared. Even when people talked and wrote badly about him for no apparent reason, he would be as cool as ever. If questioned, he would say“Anger is a terrible weakness. Have nothing to do with it. Be kind. Be compassionate towards those who are ignorant. They will understand one day. Just be patient.” Once when a friend of ours informed him of the bad things another spiritual guru had written about him, he said “This is his opinion. I have nothing to do with it.” It was as simple as that. His favorite lines from Shakespeare are: “The good that men do is interred with their bones while the negative stays even after their death”.
I realized the simple truth that each person is entitled to have his or her opinion about anybody or anything. But, truly, it does not matter. Life goes on. Mohanji’s determination is quite evident in his everyday life. He has conviction and determination. His aim is pure and selfless. He cares for others from the heart and has zero pretensions. People leave him, and talk badly about him to many others and then when they come back to him, after recognizing their mistake, he welcomes them back as if nothing happened. I find that so beautiful.
Some complain about Mohanji using modern gadgets, being active on social media, etc. Mohanji indeed is contemporary and he uses modern gadgets to stay in touch with people. He keeps time and also keeps in contact. He says “I am living in the present. The materials available in the present are what I can access and use. This is exactly what I am expected to do as well.” Mohanji values time a lot. He wears a watch almost 24/7 and mainly sleeps with a watch around his wrist. People gift him watches and he also gifts watches to people. Why is he so ‘attached’ to watches? In his own words:
“Time on earth is precious, as we live linear to time. We have taken the body and its attachments for a specific duration. We have no right to procrastinate and waste time. Always be prompt, and do good to other people. In the absolute terms, time is exactly like money on earth. Time is the transactional material in karmic life. Just as our time on earth is precious and limited, others time is equally precious. We have no right to take anyone’s time for granted, unless otherwise if it is beyond our control. I keep time. I ride on time. Wrist watch makes me aware of my time, the flow of time and the need to move on. Wrist watch is a reminder, a connection that reminds me of earthly duties and its available duration. In a watch, I look at a bright dial which glows in the night with which I can read the time in the night, date, month and day. This keeps me with time. If I do not keep time, how am I living my message?”
Mohanji doesn’t not give any importance whatsoever to formalities of any type. Touching the feet of the elders and one’s guru especially, is most natural in most parts of India. It is something that is nurtured throughout one’s upbringing. In the West however, the same is mainly perceived as an act of submission, something that is awkward and inappropriate. I always find it interesting to observe how uncomfortable the non-Indian nationals who come for our meditations feel when they see the Indians lining up to touch the feet of Mohanji. If there are newcomers I always make it a point to explain the following to them: you are by no means obliged to touch Mohanji’s feet and should never feel pressured to do so just because others do it. Mohanji will not be offended or disappointed if you shake his hand or give him a hug instead. However, if you do feel comfortable/happy to do it, here is what needs to be understood: Bowing to the feet of the Master is a physical action that supports the mental/emotional process of nullification of the ego and full surrender to Divine. Moreover, one should not just bow, but gently place his/her third eye onto the tip of the Guru’s big toe. Something indescribably profound happens in that moment. If one is eligible, that one moment in time can change the person’s karmic blueprint and bring about deep cleansing and utmost bliss.
When a small group of us in Muscat did Mohanji’s Pada Pooja (worship of the feet of the Master) for the first time (this was back in 2011, in Muscat). I watched him going into expanded state as the mantras were being chanted and his feet washed with rose water, milk, etc. The atmosphere was very loving, auspicious, intimate.
When my turn came, I felt like placing my third eye onto the tip of his big toe (I remembered the insight about a subtle connection between Ajna chakra and the big toe from my Yoga Teachers Training in India). I somehow reached the sofa and sat into meditation. I could not move for quite some time as I went into a most blissful, breathless state – it was as if I was placed inside an energy bubble which stopped all my thoughts and made me experience the purest state of beingness. I remember that the voices of others seemed as if they were coming from a distance and even if I would open my eyes I could not even blink – nothing could disturb that perfect stillness and most wondrous aliveness which filled every cell of my body.
Mohanji explained to me later that I went into a type of Samadhi state, I ‘drank from the Source.’ I learned from that experience that, when it comes to ancient practices, one should always look beyond the seeming formalities…
Once I heard Mohanji saying something that I truly cherished and applied immediately in my everyday life: “This is a perishable piece of flesh; yours too. Whenever you scandalize, criticize, judge or spread hatred against anyone, remember clearly that you are getting contaminated. Your inner space is becoming devil’s workshop. More than the one whom you try to harm, you are getting harmed. Your inner guru, your guiding force is suffering. Your conscience is getting damaged. You are adding more suffering into your endless path of existence. You are adding lifetimes of agony. Acts of kindness work right the opposite way. Hence choose kindness instead of hatred. I am not in the least affected by your opinions about me. But you are. Who wants a life filled with sorrows and hatred? Life is worth living only if it is filled with love and happiness. No guru can save anyone who keeps poisoning himself with negativity. Prevention is always better than cure. Live a disciplined and tidy life free from gossip and negativities. Life itself will take you to liberation.” Mohanji has always been clear about his path and his mission. Being an introvert, his articulation was less in the early days, but now life situations have pushed him to express more, which is something I watch with amusement. 🙂
Whenever someone alludes that I am like a ‘single mother’ or whenever my mind starts playing games, I remind myself of the grace that has brought me here, the grace that fills my life with beauty and wonder. When Mohanji made the choice to leave the corporate world at the height of his career and dedicate himself fully to spiritual work, I agreed to stay in Oman with Mila and continue working while he improvises his life. There have been tough moments, but when purpose is strong and beautiful, nothing is really all that difficult. Sacrifice and selflessness bring out the true beauty in human beings. Besides, Mohanji has the ability to express his presence even in his absence. There are many testimonials from many of you affirming his potential to be everywhere, but nowhere.
Far from being a single mother, as Mohanji cares for us every single moment, one way or the other, I behold the beautiful platform for serving thousands across the globe, the opportunities for service and upliftment of many that he keeps creating with utmost spontaneity. He continues to create these beautiful platforms for me and many others who are walking the path with him, without partiality or selfishness. I know not what my life would have been like without Mohanji in it, but am certain that I couldn’t have possibly created such a platform for service on my own. Mohanji’s activities worldwide are ours too – as a family we flow through all of it together, through all the ups and downs on the path. Mohanji never owns anything. It is up to us to make best use of the platform that he has created or else it will remain only that – a platform, a mold out of which something beautiful could have been created. Everyone’s contribution to the great cause is truly valuable. Words from the context of American football come to my mind – “When given a ball, you must run with it.”
All in all, what is there to complain about? What more could I possibly ask for? So rest assured, my beloved readers, I am perfectly happy and contented. I cannot ask for more. Neither could I have got a master as a husband nor could I have created such a large platform for service, without the grace of the Divine. I do not intend to steal his presence from all of you nor can I enjoy his company alone. He belongs to the world. He is love incarnate. He is just too eager to give you everything that he can. As Mohanji says “I came empty handed. I give all I have here. And I leave empty handed.”
I would like to highlight Mohanji’s words which I find to be equally applicable to the East and West of today, to all for that matter: “Generation after generation has crucified those who expressed compassion without expectation out of sheer love. Never be perturbed by criticism which comes out of non-understanding. Be always objective. The mission is above everything. Liberation from the birth and death cycle is the most important thing in everyone’s life. Nothing else in the world is permanent. Nothing else is worth it. All are sensory pleasures. Feel free to enjoy them, if you have desires for them, with the clear understanding that life is beyond these pleasures. A liberated person can enjoy every moment in perfect detachment. Nothing is taboo. Nothing binds. A seeker could very well be bound if he indiscriminately indulges in sensory pleasures. This is the difference. What matters is awareness. What matters is objectivity. Nothing is good or bad for a liberated being. Everything is just part of existence. Life moves on. Live liberated. Leave liberated. Do not get involved in any kind of negativity through food, emotions or intellect. Consume only positive stuff. Avoid all those who bring negativity to you and give them positivity instead, without contaminating yourself.”
Suppression and any form of pretension (including ‘Holier than Thou’-type spiritual ego expressions) was never my cup of tea. When Mohanji and I got married I told him that I hoped no posing and pretension would be expected of me as a “Guruma” (Guru’s wife), that cultural differences surely exist and I may not meet the expectations of all his devotees in India. He smiled and said “You are more Indian than many Indians” (referring to my passion for Yoga, service and satwic lifestyle). He assured me that on our path one should always remain natural, spontaneous and true to him/herself.
Finally, I would like to touch upon one more important topic. While physically present in this realm of duality, Masters too are vulnerable and although able to rise above the suffering, they do experience pain. Being a Master, expressing openly and being accessible to people is something that requires unimaginably great courage for negative forces will not hesitate to scheme, manipulate and attack. The attacks can happen directly or through people who are filled with negativity and unconsciously (or sometimes even by free will) become their instruments. I have witnessed several horrific astral attacks on Mohanji. One that I will never forget resulted in his spine deforming into a letter S…
– as Mohanji operates through the spine, they were aiming to hit where it ‘counts the most’ and they surely caused some nuisance, but Mohanji recovered within a couple of days. Generally, he always plays it down, if not add some humor.
Needless to say, I was deeply concerned for Mohanji’s wellbeing and it hurt me to see him in pain, unable to sleep properly. A group of us gathered to perform Arati on Mohanji and pray to Baba, from the bottom of our heart, to heal Mohanji…
We had the most memorable Divine experience that evening, which I don’t have the inner confirmation to share. Mohanji soon got healed and our joy knew no bounds!
I recall one morning when Mohanji’s body looked far more muscular than usual. I could not help but notice that and asked him how that happened. He told me that he had fought a big battle with demonic forces on the astral plane the whole night, in rescue of one helpless being who was like a lamb surrounded by bloodthirsty wolves. I’ve also met several people so far who have asked Mohanji whether he could open their third eye. However, they do not have spiritual, mental and emotional maturity to be able to handle all that comes with the opening of the third eye… This is a process that should never be rushed and manipulated. Sometimes, ignorance is indeed bliss.
When our daughter Mila fell from a height of 4,5m onto a marble floor in Nov 2013, I experienced pain incomparable to anything else I’ve ever experienced. I have been through a war, the humiliations of being a refugee, risked my life on daily basis while working for the UN in Kosovo and went through a near-death experience, but nothing could be compared to this. Any parent would gladly trade his/her life for that of a child. The way Mohanji handled this situation is something I will never forget – after three days in ICU, we were able to ‘bounce back’ and even went onto stage the during ACT Fusion concert, dressed up in colorful clothes, as if nothing had happened. This experience was truly magical.
During this speech I realized why I had to be born in a country ridden by war and undergo certain tough experiences– suddenly it all made a lot of sense. I realized how Existence was preparing me all along for this path, helping me develop the courage and determination required to tread the pathless path, the path to Liberation.
It was then that I realized that when we are connected to Mohanji, physically or metaphysically, or even when he is around physically or non-physically, things just happen – big problems become laughable jokes. There is always a surge in energy and we are put on the fast track of objectivity. He magically solves tough issues and makes us walk the path to strengthen and empower us.
With this positive note, I shall conclude this blog aimed at setting things straight with respect to various people’s questions directed to me about my life with Mohanji. Perhaps many of you are fortunate to spend more time with Mohanji as he keeps on traveling. I do not envy you. I believe you have earned that time and your connection with him. In the end, all of us get what we deserve. The Law of Karma, just like Law of Gravitation, is infallible.
Life is as it flows. We are all one.
In love and service,